I play with players, I am careful with the hearts of the really nice ones, but there is another.
It's been a while since we have seen each other and we agreed I would stop by after a birthday celebration for a friend. My girlfriend understanding this dynamic was concerned and asked me if I was okay with going over there.
Translation: I know you want to see him, I know you love him, can you handle it emotionally?
I feel good, I feel strong and I can't wait to see him and spend some time with him.
It will be five years this November that he has been in my life. When I walk in the door, we slide into our comfortable routine and tonight was no different.
Happy. Playful. So happy to see him.
Cuddled up in his arms on the couch we catch up on each others lives. His voice, his humor, his mannerisms, his scent, did I say his voice, rich and deep? He is talking, being playful with his lips against my forehead and kissing me when a wave of emotion washes over me and I could feel tears fill my eyes exposing my heart.
"Are you getting sentimental?" he asks me softly. He never misses a beat, he never has. He is the only one that doesn't let me get away with anything. He is such a man. He is a cop. He is vice. He is a trained professional. He is by nature aware of every blink, sigh and heartbeat in his presence.
I am undone. In all my bravado, this one is my kryptonite.
I can't breathe and I want to run out the door. So frustrated with my tears. So frustrated that I lost my stoic front.
He knows why. I know why. I love him.
He is my rock and I trust him with everything important in life. I deeply admire & respect the man he is.
I feed fun into my life with busyness, activity and dating a plethora of men, but at the end of all that there is a hollowness in my heart that only love can fill.
An evening with Bobby.
He has my heart, he is my kryptonite.
