My relationship with my daughter is transitioning from raising her from birth to the amazing young woman she has become at almost 18 years old. It is changing from a mommy/daughter relationship to that of true friendship, an unbreakable bond of love, respect, and womanhood.
Welcome to girlfriendhood, sisterhood, and womanhood, my sweet girl.
I value our unique perspectives in life, our different strengths, yet DNA that makes us one in the same.
She is a young woman now and her world is changing. Decisions in life she makes are hers to choose, yet it is me she trusts in total confidence for direction. I gently guide, but I am slowly letting her go.
Tonight I shared with her an old movie, a treasured favorite I've had for years, How To Make An American Quilt.
After receiving a marriage proposal, Finn leaves to spend the summer with her grandmother and great aunt to finish her thesis and think over the proposal. At her grandmother's house, a quilting group congregates, and she's shocked and surprised to discover that the current quilt that they're working on is a wedding gift for when she gets married. The theme of the quilt is "where love resides". As Finn is unsure whether she's ready for marriage or whether he's the right one for her life, the stories of the women in the quilting group open her eyes to the different kinds of love that exist.
Mariah thoroughly enjoyed the movie and thanked me for sharing it with her.
I've watched this movie many times since it came out in 1995 and it was yet again another opportunity for me to share with my daughter how much women need other women in their lives. How much I value and learn about myself the time I spend with my own grandmother.
After the movie, I called my grandmother. She is in the hospital waiting to having a double bypass heart surgery on Tuesday. It is late and she said she is tired, but wanted to share something with me first.
She said, "I am 88 years old, I've lived a long life, and I don't want to live forever. I've decided to not go under the knife and have open heart surgery. I've had a good life, but I am going to die on God's timeline. Will you please come see me very soon we have details to go over."
I can't even talk. Tears are spilling down my cheeks, but I understand. She is just ready.
Somehow I knew this would be her decision of choice and I am not surprised.
She could very well change her mind in the next couple of days, but I'm betting she doesn't.
I respect her decision and I let her know.
I love her and I am going to miss her deeply. Her time is short and I need to get back down to those mountains of Virginia to be with my grandmother before she leaves this life of old age and enters a heaven we believe in and is embraced by God.
