My Arms Filled with Grandbabies

 

My daughter's funny and I cracked up at her text. I'm not sure who was more excited to have me come home from vacation, her or my grandbabies. I believe its mutual. Me, I was happy to see all of them and I came home with souvenirs, which Sofia clearly was not letting her momma forget!

With my Fitbit on, I was ready for an evening with my babies. At 1 year and 3 years old, I definitely get my steps running in my house. Rowan would point and I would ask, "Do you want me to chase you?" His eyes would light up like stars and he'd shake his head wildly, "Yes!" 

He still doesn't talk much and my name is still, Ma to him. It's so hard to believe he will be 2 years old in a couple of months. 

Sofia loves presents! She also loves being at my house and I love that she is so comfortable here knowing where everything is. Rowan does, too. She just slides into what interests her.

My favorite part of my evening with them was when Rowan got sleepy. He grabbed his blanky and sippy cup and snuggled on my lap. Sofia said, "wHeRe aM i gOiNg tO sIt?" 

Ohhhhh, this grandmomma will always have plenty of room in my arms for my babies. She climbed onto my lap and as my arms were full of love, I still have moments that hit me where I cannot believe I am a grandmother. My arms filled with my snuggly grandbabies, I pulled up videos on my phone. One of their favorites is with Brooke & Alex's sweet little puppy, Hamilton. It was the day my grandbabies met my grand-fur baby and they were playing chase through my house. 

It was a moment where I wanted time to slow down, my two grands snuggled on my lap and in my arms and yet another arriving in only 6 weeks. I. Cannot. Wait. 

Beach Hair and Salty Air

 

Vacation was sunshine and palm trees, boardwalks and sandy beaches, and beach hair and salty air. It was beautiful and I love my mom & dad's new location they are staying by the water. 

A bouquet that washed up on shore. 

The best seafood in all of Florida is the understated Coastal Crab Company. Pulling up to this tiny place with all the beach vibes and seafood excellence, if I lived at the beach, I would absolutely open a small beach diner with fabulous food and welcome home feel. It's always a must go to!

The crab, shrimp & grits was perfect. A plate of oysters and we knew we had the best that seafood by the ocean offers. 

Another fabulous find is Squid Lips...

We simply had to go back for drinks on the dock. The scenery was picture perfect and according to statistics, my resting heart rate dropped 8 points while on vacation. 

We celebrated Dad's 73rd birthday. Happy birthday, Dad.

My vacation started off with a surprise hot stone massage from my mom & dad for coming to see them. What a great way to wake up the 1st morning of vacation! Several road trip adventures, we went to Palm Beach to the Flagler Museum and saw the majestic Kapok tree. Toured the National Navy SEAL Museum, shopped my favorite shabby chic shops and bought new fun purchases. We took walks every day and toured new areas and beaches. 

Brooke and Alex stayed with us part of the vacation and rented their own house with a pool several days. They went to Miami where they enjoyed hands-on training with the dolphins and their own time together. 

I got my toes in the water,

ass in the sand,

Not a worry in the world,

a cold beer in my hand,

Life is good today,

life is good today.

Of course songs are inspired in this setting. Waking up to sunshine everyday, the water filled with weathered boat docks and birds, all you can do is breathe in fresh salty air and relax. 

It was perfect. 

Tan Lines, Flip Flops & Sand

 

It's been a beautiful white winter, but sunshine and palm trees are calling me and I am ready to trade my coat and boots for something much more freeing...

... and the chair in my office... 

... it's time for me to bid you adieu. 

The Power of Choice

 

The sweetest words were said to me today and I said half-joking, mostly serious, "I will re-read your words when I need reminded...

you are truly a woman which all women should be cast from...

His words are a warm hug of friendship and respect. Like a gentle rain in the springtime and me a flower basking in it's warm shower. 

I'm grateful for lessons learned in life when given a choice, I chose what matters to me. I feel more free saying words I feel versus the internal suffocation of leaving words unsaid. There is a quiet confidence that comes with being at peace with myself, speaking my truth. 

No, I cannot control what happens in life, but I chose to control the way I respond. That is where the power is. 

  

My Little Valentine

 

In the car, I told her I had a Valentine's gift for her and when we walk in the door, she has to pick up her Minnie basket, because I hid candy all over the house for a Valentine candy scavenger hunt. She replied, "oH mY gOsH, i aM gOiNg  tO   f R e A k   O u T! [Said in high pitched excitement.]

It's her new term and she's only 3. 

She asked me what took me so long to pick her up. For the record, I was actually a few minutes early. I said I had a few stores I had to run to. She asked what stores. This is said in the tone of commanding answers. It's just in her DNA. 

She asked if I've already put the candy all over the house before I picked her up. I did. 

Do I know all of her cousins names? I prattled them off, but forgot Junie-bugs. She reminded me. 

Picking up lunch, she ran excitedly all over the house picking up candy and loved her Valentine's Day gift, clip-on little girl earrings. 

We played ice cream shop, ate candy, played doll house, played swimming pool with her dolls in the sink with bubbles, we both dressed up in fancy dresses and heels and went to the ball twirling and dancing with each other. It was hours of entertainment.

My favorite part of the day was when we were playing ice cream, which is really her making bowls of real ice cream with whip topping and candy and eating it, she came over and sat on my lap and snuggled against me. I wrapped my arms around her sturdy little body, smelled her hair, kissed her cheeks and sent up a "thank you, God." 

Several hours later, it was time to go home because I had my strength training class. She wanted me to show her what kind of exercises I do. Then, she showed me Jeremy's exercises which were sit ups.

"yOu hAvE a rEaLlY bIg hOuSe, gRaMmy... iTs pReTtY." Thank you, Sofia.

On the way home, she was singing Itsy Bitsy Spider over and over and mid-song, there was silence... her head was down and she was lights out! 

My sweet grandbaby, Happy Valentine's Day, Sofia. I love you. 

4 Years

It's been four years. 

Sometimes it's like a breeze that opens the window of our memories that hit so unexpectedly. Like an invisible thread that pulls us back in time... 

We are riding bikes on the towpath on a hot summer day, laughing and seeing how long we could ride with no hands. Those moments, I always whispered, "Thank you, God." 

Sometimes it's a moment in a movie scene we shared in real life, the night we put Sammy Blue down and he put his paw in my hand. That was the first time I ever saw your heart break. We loved him so much. 

A song that puts us slow dancing on the winery patio on a warm summer night. I didn't want the song to end. I especially love that photo of us. I was so tipsy, happy, and yearning for you...

I feel wonderful

Because I see the love light in your eyes

And the wonder of it all

Is that you just don't realize how much I love you

Memories wash over me and sometimes it's a matter of seconds before I push them far down and bury them, then everything is okay. 

A lot happened four years ago. 

I remember it hurting to breathe and my goal in the morning was to just make it through the day. That's all I had to do. The days turned into weeks and I remember when it became a couple of months, I was overwhelmed with fear we had taken it too far. Then, the months rolled into years. 

I know you think about me and I know you miss me. We are still attached, and, it still hurts. We both know. 

The day you proposed to her, we text all day long. I know you can't be alone. 

You see, I already knew you had gotten engaged before you couldn't wait to tell me. Hurt people, hurt people. I know what you read hurt, too. 

Then, you reached out, again. It was much sooner than I expected. Perhaps you call it nostalgia, I know you long for what I give you. Moments of sensationalism is intoxicating, but it doesn't last. I was home.

I can't respond to you.

If you can stand in front of a holy God and make a covenant for forever, I wish you happiness. I believe you will out of pride and image, I know you well. 

I know you read this blog, far more than you should. I will share, this next week cannot pass quick enough. Triggers of memories are hitting me unexpectedly and I don't understand why. As if invisible powers of the universe are speaking. 

Still, not a day goes by. 

Tiffany Blue

 

When my adult daughter texts, "Nails today?" YESSSSSSS! 

Brooke is looking glam in Tiffany Blue and I went my signature color Deep Red. 

#vacationpreparation

#adultdaughterlife

A FaceTime Call

 

I was working at my desk when a FaceTime call came across my phone. A welcome reprieve, smiling, I snatched my phone up and stepped out of the office.

Catching up on the call, when she said, "Hold on... Jeremy's home."

"Hi Jeremy!"

"Jeremy, it's Dawn!"

"Jeremy... it's Dawn..."

"Jeremy, it's Dawn..."

I hear Jeremy walking up the stairs over the phone, when he asked, "Who is it?"

"It's Dawn!" 

"Oh, hi Dawn!" he yelled. "Hi, Jeremy!" I said back through the phone.

This isn't my daughter I'm talking to, this is my 3 year old granddaughter, Sofia, who likes to use our first names. lol 

She is so funny and I love FaceTiming with her!! She gives me the low-down on everything. In fact, every time I pick her up for a date, the first 5 minutes in the car is her sharing everyone's details: Daddy cut his finger, mommy hurt her foot, what brother did, what her cousin said, what she ate, etc. She talks fast, almost as if she's been bottled up wanting to tell me. [I'm laughing] There's no secrets with this one! 

She showed me a picture she painted for me that will go on my frig. I asked if she would paint a 2nd picture for me for my office, too. Of course, telling her she is very talented and I know she would win every painting contest, every coloring contest, and how fast she is at running. 

I asked Sofia today if she like the brownies and her face twisted up as if she didn't know what I was talking about. She asked her mommy and mommy said the brownies were all eaten up! [I'm still laughing...] I can see it all now, fresh baked brownies not shared with anyone. Hey, when you're super pregnant, sometimes you just don't want to share, and clearly she didn't! 

Asking Sofia what she wants to do for our date this week, she said she wants to play ice cream store. This is where she brings out several cartons of ice cream and makes me a bowl of ice cream. She eats more than I get. So, I stopped at the store tonight, we now have 7 different kinds in the freezer. 

When I answer a FaceTime call and her beautiful little face is on the screen happy and ready to chat, my heart bursts with love! She is a hoot!! I cannot wait to see her. 

Valentine's... For My Girls

 

I still date my daughter's. Although they are both married, although one is a momma herself, they are both still my little girls.

I still buy little things for them, because a pretty gift bag makes the heart smile, and means I'm thinking of you.

Happy Valentine's Day

xo

Not for the Faint of Heart

 

Brooke and I were enjoying lunch together and talking when she mentioned someone we know is hurting and another who needs to step up and be the role model they are supposed to be. She shared that I was her role model growing up and while deep inside I know it, hearing it is beautiful. Brooke shared if she were the mom how she would handle the situation and it mimicked how I handled situations with her. 

She's older now and she looks at things through a wise set of eyes. Through the eyes of experience, where she was then and where she is now. Reaching this point is like running across the finish line of the world's longest marathon. Arms up and praises of "Thank you, Jesus, we made it!"

To say life was a battle is an understatement. I remember being in a very dark place with her, for a long time. Having to come to terms with myself, loving her enough, that I will always go one step further than her with every boundary she pushed. I let her know, then I had to prove it many times. I had to become one pissed off momma determined to walk through hell and did. It was war and honestly, it was spiritual warfare. This went on for years. 

God knew I could handle it, that's why He trusted me with her. She was worth every battle and we came out on the other side. She is a well-mannered, well-spoken, well put together young woman, who does the work it takes to establish and run her home. She knows her financial priorities and not only meets them, exceeds them and enjoys the rewards of working hard. She is firm in her faith and morals and lives without any vices or addictions. She is a contributing member of society and a law-abiding citizen. I am so proud of her! 

Raising great young adults is not for the faint of heart. Whether it's easy street with some or daily battles with another, do the work. 

Do the hard work of raising them right during the window of life you have them and let them fly from the nest. That's our job as a parent. 

Passive parenting makes entitled, disrespectful brats and asshole adults. 

"Little Johnny, I'm going to count to 3... 18, 19, 20... "

Enable a child's poor behavior and... continue to support them and clean up their messes because they cannot function for years that far exceed the age of 18. It absolutely adds unnecessary years of drama to their life and yours. And, if you don't like your own kids, nobody else does either. 

FIREWORKS!

 

There were FIREWORKS going off in my office today!! WINNER!  

My phones were ringing and text messages were blowing up my phone! On today's all staff call across the country, my photo popped up on the webinar, and I was spotlighted as the Value Winner of the Month. The topic of the month: Innovation.

On the call was the corporate office and the management teams from 160 locations nationwide. 

What is equally as wonderful as me being the winner is the CEO of the really large company (nationwide & internationally) that just acquired us was on today's call, too!! My colleagues were, it's probably safe to say shocked, when I shared with them the email I received from this CEO last week. You see, I used to support Presidents & CEO's in my former professional life and I very politely introduced myself via email and he very pleasantly replied right away. Timing is EVERYTHING! What a blessing, thank you, God! The seed is planted. My name is in front of him, again. He is so good looking, too!

It was so sweet, the VP of Operations sent me a congratulatory text! Of course, my team, and my #1 cheerleader, my GM. He will shine a spotlight on me any day and I appreciate him! My thanks will always go to him for his trust, freedom and full support he gives me. 

Those on the Sales Call across the country are really going to be sick of me, because my two new initiatives are going to be the topics of conversation for the next two months. Corporate contacted me today and scheduled a call with me on Monday to develop details for these. 

The mental stimulations of it all gives me such a high! 

To think once upon a time I wanted to work for the most high-end venue locally. Now I get to play nationwide and internationally! 

Yayyy, God!!

 

I've been known to leave a wall bare for five years until I've found the perfect piece to grace the wall. Basically, I don't care what I pay for something that I fall in love with, but I wait until I know... this is perfect. 

Moving into my new home last spring, I haven't had a bedding set in my bedroom because I wasn't sure exactly what color I wanted my walls, then I could make a clear decision. White washing my walls, I'm ready for bedding. Pouring for months online, I finally found the perfect bedding! Well, the perfect pillow shams that radiate shabby chic.

It was pre-Christmas and as I collect $25 gift cards every 1-1/2 months from banking points earned, between my 20% of Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons, my gift cards, and my free plasma card, this bed set totaling (each piece) $515 was going to be FREE!

Walking in with my grand financial plan in place, this product is discontinued. 

It's all about the sham and I contemplated choosing another color simply for the shams. It was awful. I was in and out of the store thrice! Does any store in any part of the world have this? Fine, I will search the world wide web, there has to be something similar. There isn't. 

Another color in this simply won't work. How can I make this happen?!

One more trip to the store, perhaps with a little more emphasis I will find someone willing to search the corners of the earth.

On my short drive there, I uttered, [Lord] "Would you help me with this?" That was it. No holy prayer of length.

Pulling in I saw Marshalls and remembered they had bedding and would take a quick peak. 

I found a bedding set in icy pink color I was looking for. It was King size for my Queen size bed. I specifically wanted oversized. To see if the size would be too big, I bought it with the plan of returning it. 

Do you see this?!?! He found it and lead me there!! Yayyy, God!!

The fabric so super soft, much softer than my original set and only $55 total for everything. It was a simple prayer, a plea for His help as I could not find any other option.

It was a beautiful reminder that while He is silent on long overdue big prayer requests, He is listening. If He is paying attention to the little, insignificant details in my life, He absolutely is aware of my bigger requests. Perhaps that was His gentle reminder. 

He has given me every good and perfect gift in my life. I expect nothing less on His future plans for me. 

My new chandelier and bedding set finally meet. Thank you, Lord. 

Exceptional

 

Ahhhh, it's time for the annual review. Like a report card and I feel bad for Dominic, the General Manager, and my office roommate for the last two years. I know this puts him in an uncomfortable situation knowing I will have comments. 

Let me say this, he is a really, really, really nice guy. He believes everyone is giving their best (I get a whiff of shady and I educate him), he's very patient and kind, (I shed light in a heartbeat when someone has a target on his back and I fight smart), he is very nonconfrontational (I will tie my hair back and battle in a moments notice), he believes avidly in wearing masks (me, not so much), his side of the office is always messy and my side is super tidy with my beautiful desk & chair I bought for myself, and our opposites go on in many ways. Including, I believe, our political beliefs. We are opposites. Being opposites is a strength and we are a great balance and friends.

He also knows me very well. When you share an office 30-40 hours a week for a couple of years you know someone's personality. Meaning, he knows who I am, what I think at the moment, and alllllll I believe in. This is what makes my annual review so shocking. 

High marks on everything, then he has to list my strengths. He was generous with his words using impressive description. I'm not going to list them, because I'm not bragging here. Being a "words" girl, I was impressed!

Then, he has to list my weaknesses (This is where I get nervous for him! ha ha )... He listed I could learn the point-of-sale-system more in depth. I BURST our laughing!! Looked over and told him that was an excellent choice and to use it for next year's review. I have zero interest in learning the POS system for over counter purchases (if I have to jump in as bartender or at the grill). You need I.T. training to run this thing with all it's mishaps. I use a paper hashtag system then put the numbers in. Next, he lists "beat ______ (the other venue in 1st place, as I am in 2nd place). Again, I laughed at his cleverness. Third, that I find an assistant. That was sweet. This year I need to find two assistants to close my parties. The schedule will be intense come summer and I have to have this role trained and in place.

I thanked him for being so generous, with my points rating = EXCEPTIONAL

Looking over, I said, "Do you know what I love most about this review? The comment you made where I am a blessing to the ENTIRE company. Thank you." 

He was so sweet and genuine when he said he knows my worth and knows that I don't have to stay where I am at. That could go anywhere, do anything, and be successful. These words mean a lot to me. 

We are a great team because he trusts me and gives me complete freedom to do what I want, try what I want, and he fully supports me. He is also generous with me with complete schedule freedom and running the show freedom, knowing I give more than I take. 

This review meant a lot to me. He was lavishly generous with his words, being a person who knows me very well. The poor guy shares an office with me with no escape from my opinions, my personality, and my competitive nature. Yet, he fully supports me. Thank you.

It’s Time

 

My first thought when I saw this notice in my mailbox was, "Are you EFFING kidding me?!?!" My second thought was, "Good... this is the perfect segue for a much needed conversation..."

A heavy snowfall last night and I woke up to all the local schools closed and my street had tire tracks. Taking a friend to the airport and heading into work, it never crossed my mind that my sidewalk wasn't shoveled for the mailman. I was contemplating if the roads were safe enough to even drive.

Today was the 1st time my sidewalk was not shoveled since I moved in this house last spring.

Here are my grievances with the postal carriers...

       - When the snow falls and my house looks like a postcard WITH the driveway and sidewalk shoveled, how about you NOT walk through my yard (clearly the snow isn't an issue), and don't leave foot prints in the snow disrupting the picturesque scene in front of my house?! Every. Single. Day. when I pull in and out of my driveway, I see those footprints where the mailperson walks through my yard instead of on my sidewalk and it infuriates me. I struggle to not call the post office daily. 

      - How about my mail being three weeks late over Christmas? Utilities and Christmas cards intended for December, arriving the 3rd week in January. The kind of service I need and expect?

We all have our quirks. If you are not one of my grandbabies, stay off my snow. 

The postal carrier had the nerve to put this in my mailbox? 

Thank you... I will be calling the post office tomorrow.