My Stitches Are Out!

Okay, the 2nd worse thing to getting stitches is going to the appointment to get them removed. Ugh! It was probably 20 degrees this morning and I could feel myself sweating walking into the dermatologist office.

I'm grateful to have these little annoyances out of my back. Good news, the mole was benign. No cancer. Thank you, God!

I've always said it's interesting in life when something happens, those who step up and show extra support and those who you expect the support you, do nothing.

Those who stepped up: my mom was my #1 most vocal worrier and supporter and my immediate family are prayer warriors that I know prayed for cancer-free. My daughters, my mom & dad and my brother.

Those who I expected concern from, haven't even called to ask or see if the results are back. These friends, each of whom have had recent minor to significant health issues I have worried about them, prayed for, supported, checked on often, encouraged, and transported by car related to their health concerns. Not one of them remembered I had a questionable biopsy.

I am going to stop writing here before I write candidly the comments I'd really like to say. I’m ready to pull back my bow and release an arrow bullseye on a target of the self absorbed that know who to call in their prayer emergency. You know, the ones to don’t hesitate to ask for prayer, then where are they beyond an initial conversation of concern when it involves another persons life once their scare has passed?

Some do nothing but talk.

Good night, world wide web.

Loves vs. Loved

I caught myself as I was writing a message this morning to Chef's family, I had an epiphany.

Chef kept his family close and provided for them by providing job opportunities for them. His ex-wife, Sheila, whom he has a solid relationship with, works as a banquet server. Jacob, the father to his grandchildren works as his right hand in the kitchen and has for many years. They have been on my team working events. I never did get to meet his fiance.

Proof reading my message I was sending to Sheila and Jacob, I couldn't just say, "You are in my prayers." He was my friend and I wanted them to have comfort knowing how highly I thought of him and wanted them to know how proud he was of his family (Chef & Sheila have adult children and grandchildren).

A snippet of what I wrote was, " ... Chef loved his family and he was crazy about his grand children."

Loved.

Was.

Past tense. That is when it hit me.

Listen, pay attention, lend me an ear, hear what I am saying so it isn't forgotten, one day ... when I pass on from my life here on earth do not tell my daughters and my grand children that I loved them and was crazy about them.

I fear I would storm all over heaven and send lightning bolts.

Tell them, I love them. Tell them I am wildly, madly, crazy in love with them. One day I will be released from my earthly body, but I will be very much alive in heaven and my love for them will last forever and always.

Life on earth is for a moment. Eternity in heaven is forever and don't think for a second my love will die because my body did.

Please don't talk in past tense to my family.

Happy I hadn't sent my message to Chef's family, I changed loved to loves and was to is, because he does love them.

Love doesn't die.

Chef Bob, My Friend

Some people come into your life for a season and sprinkle laughter, wit, friendship and if you're lucky, the most wonderful food.

At the beginning of a big event tonight, I was asked if I heard about Chef, Chef Bob?

He died in his sleep last night.

Blindsided, it didn't make sense?! My friend, Chef, is so full of spunk and spice and life.

It's funny the thoughts that raced through my mind. When did I see him last? When he came in to meet the new management team, he walked into my office with the new management guys sitting there, in grand arrival looked at me first and said, "Hello, Sunshine!" then he looked at them and introduced himself.

Two hours later he walked out the door. That was the last time I saw him.

The last time I spoke with him was a week ago, we were playing phone tag, which we often did because we are both so busy. We never did connect on what we needed to discuss, but that was our working relationship and it was fine for us.

Bob, had to be around 57 years old. He had three adult children and two adorable grandsons he was incredibly in love with. He was a workaholic who's passion was cooking, he was eloquent and well spoken, deeply loved his family, and he truly was an artist.

He adored me and we were a great team. The Langmore's annoyed his soul and with his dry wit, I would roll in laughter at his sarcasm and bulls eye comments describing each family member. We would laugh, bond, then work.

He would ask me if I was hungry, what do I want to eat? I would say, what ever is easiest and minutes later an amazing presentation would be presented to me on a plate fit to be photographed in a magazine.

When the sale was going through where we work together, he wrote me a reference letter, wanting to secure my position and here is what he said:

From the desk of Chef Robert *******

11/22/18

To Whom It May Concern,

This letter is to offer introduction and reference for Ms. Dawn ******, a young lady of great and various talents and abilities.

....

Dawn is a powerhouse of social interaction and business connectivity. She has a visionary attitude that is driven by an organized mind, and a bubbly but savvy personality, and her promotional mindset and constant energy, coupled with an unorthodox view of how to bring very different clients and consumers together are strong tools in today’s socially driven business universe.

Dawn possesses and displays considerable analytic strengths, both in practical applications of structure and in design theory, she sees in advance of issues; missed opportunities, future client outreach, branding issues, and pockets of stagnant or unattended development inside an existing format.

Combined with her personality and energy, I believe Dawn to be a universal asset to any business that requires growth, promotion, energy and talent with a human face.

In closing, in my 41 years in the hospitality industry, I have often wished for a team mate of Dawn’s character and caliber. In my opinion, no company could ask for a better representative, nor an individual a better friend.

Sincerely,

Robert *******
Executive Chef                                                                               

My heart is breaking at his passing.

Chef was my friend and I will truly carry the fondest memories of him. I will miss his commanding presence, his dry wit and humor, his friendship, and his incredible culinary talent. He took pride in his work and I learned so much from him.

He was my friend and will truly be missed.

Rest in peace, Chef.

Planning Well

Once upon a time, I was so excited to be in my 40's that I planned very well. I had my uterus removed at 39 years old to welcome my 40's without, well, an unneeded uterus. Lol 

Every year, I do something special for me around my birthday. Buy a house, buy a sporty car, take a spontaneous trip, get my belly pierced, get a tattoo, remove my uterus, sell my house, etc. Really, it can be anything that comes to mind. 

Here I am, 10 years later with 49 approaching, which is the segue to 50, another milestone birthday.

My home sold, loving life as an empty nester, LOVING life as a grandmomma, another grand baby on the way, and my youngest getting married this year is a fabulous place in life to be and I am so blessed and grateful. 

Goals don't stop when milestones are reached. New goals, hopes and dreams continue and as a girl who likes to make a statement in life, I certainly feel like I need to make a statement at 50. 

I kind of have an idea what that is going to look like. Not just one goal, but three. I have just written them down and dated them with today's date. 

Planning well well is a choice and I like personal goals and challenges, always doing something different.

Pray like it all depends on God

and work like it all depends on me. 

Tidying Up

It's nice to see a show that teaches how to clean up an overwhelmed home and I like to quickly watch the before and afters even if I fast forward through the middle of the show, through the struggle of going through the clean-up process.

I was very organized prior to selling my home; however, selling, sorting through piles of what to keep and what to purge, and only taking what I really wanted was a cleansing in a new beginning process.

Now, everything is organized. Even my food pantry and cupboards look good and I wouldn't be embarrassed if anyone looked. 

I like leaving my home and it looks perfect and walking back in and everything is in it's place. It's actually so much less stressful to put things back right away, it simply removes the chore of cleaning up. 

I clean (dust, vacuum, wash down everything), but I don't have to clean up.

Tidying Up is a cute show teaching the art of letting go of things you don't need, learning to live with only the things you do and like the most. Kudos to Marie Kondo for making cleaning up fun with easy to accomplish steps! 

The only part of the show that makes me cringe, which seems to be all the rage is saying "thank you" to each item before it is discarded. Parents teaching their kids say "thank you" to things is a cute and seemingly harmless practice, but notice how it takes their eyes off gratefulness to God and puts it on to possessions. 

We may have an appreciation for things, we don't thank things.

How about to show gratefulness before discarding, teach kids to look up and say "Thank you, God, this was a fun toy to play with," or "Thank you, God, I really liked wearing this shirt" as you recall good memories.  

Keep the concept, shift the appreciation so they remember who to really thank. 

Love Letters

As I climbed into bed last night and reached in my nightstand for a book, I saw a stack of letters Brooke wrote to me. Each a different topic to be opened when ...

I chose the envelope that said, "Open when you need a laugh! :) 

Inside was a sweet handwritten note and several cute jokes.

My favorite joke she include was: 

What's the dumbest thing you believed as a child? 

Answer: Once I'm 18 my mom won't be able to tell me what I can and can't do anymore.

I LOVE this! My sweet and loving daughter, I love you, Brooke! xo 

There are still several envelopes to open, one cannot be opened until her wedding day. Keeping my promise, I open them on the occasion she wrote on the envelope. 

These are letters full of love to me and I hope she knows one day, this blog is my love letter to both my daughters and my grand babies. That one day when they miss me, they hear my voice and in case they fear they are forgetting details, I've captured many, for them. 

Words of love are free. 

Use them lavishly and generously. 

Winning at Hibernation

Yep, it has been snowing all day and I am mastering winning at hibernation!

No need to venture out, perusing Amazon Prime with a few clicks later, I ordered myself an electric fireplace with 3D flame for added warmth and toasty ambiance. I'm excited for it to arrive this week.

Caught between a delicious selection of hot teas, homemade cookies, Netflix, a good book and a nap, I seem to flutter from one thing to another. For dinner, I believe I am going to make an oven roasted turkey, loaded mashed potatoes, and green beans.

I could go down to the clubhouse and work out in the fitness center and bring back Starbucks coffee or see who wants to brave the elements and come over? Such decisions and choices to make on a winter snow storm day.

Hibernation tip #827: When your bed linens come out of the dryer and they are toasty and warm, instead of putting them on your bed right away, use them as blanket while watching Netflix and sipping a cup of tea.

Weekend Snow Storm

It's all over the news, a snow storm is coming this weekend with 8-13" of snow tomorrow. That is music to my ears! 

I have worked every single day with no weekends off since January 2nd and I am so perfectly happy to be snowed in for a couple of days. 

In preparation, I went to the store last night to stock my house in meals that require oven-cooking preparation because I am in the mood to cook. I baked thick & soft chocolate chip cookies last night for a yummy treat to enjoy inside as I watch massive amounts of snow fall, from the comforts of home.

Netflix, wine, specialty teas, home cooked meals, the clubhouse, fitness center, pool table, this girl will be happy and content hibernating safely inside as the roads will be treacherous outside.

Snowstorms are beautifully (in)convenient, it just depends on your planning and perspective.

Smell This

"Here, smell this ..." my Dermatologist said as she handed me a cotton ball with alcohol on it to act as smelling salts. 

She could clearly tell by my face I wasn't doing well and I could feel the pressure in my head that I was heading down the path of passing out.

I had just had a suspicious looking mole cut out of my back and it required stitches. 

I have a secret fear of stitches. The last time I had stitches where I was awake was when I was probably 4 years old cutting an apple. I've had many surgeries through the years, but I was asleep during the surgeries and my doctors were gracious enough to always give me dissolvable stitches, until this week.

There is just something about your skin being sewn that makes me cringe inside just typing this. I don't do needles well and I never have.

So there I was a hot and sweating mess, ready to pass out.

It didn't end there.

I fell apart and I couldn't pull myself together.

Feeling overwhelmed, I was breathing so I wouldn't cry when it was over. It didn't hurt at all, it just unraveled my soul. Once I was in my car, I fell apart and I couldn't pull myself back together which is so unusual for me, because I can handle a lot.

Waves of emotions kept hitting me so I went to one of my favorite spots, the dock by the lake to gather myself together.

Life is funny, the moments where unexpected emotion overwhelms the soul when you are least expecting it. It caught me off guard.

When Mariah miscarried over the summer, I cried for weeks. My soul was overwhelmed. I still cannot talk about it without emotion and I can't even type this without needing a tissue.

A couple of stitches unraveled me. The frustration of not wanting to deal with the hassle of this suspicious mole, with a family history of melanomas, is inconvenient.

You know what else is inconvenient? These annoying little stitches I am not happy to be sporting around needs to be cleaned and covered every day.

Guess where it's at? My back. Exactly where I cannot reach them.

A Better Connection

I used to thrive in the hustle-n-bustle of life and was often the girl others would call for where to go and what to do. Young and living life to the fullest, you want to experience everything.

That is a season.

Life shifts.

At the tap of your fingertip you can find hundreds of activities and events going on locally in every city. Have an interest? There is an event.

That's fabulous and fun! Until you partake in so much of it the sensationalism is gone. It's expensive and you're worn out from having fun. Addicted to sensationalism, worn out from having fun? Absolutely. 

When you've searched to fill your insatiable soul, but it cannot be found in thrills and the noise of life.

Peace is when your soul is happy and content exactly where you are and there is no other place you'd rather be. 

When you can sit and watch television and say, "Thank you, God." 

Riding bikes on the towpath on a summer day and suddenly you realize how much you missed it, it is exactly what you longed for, and it's perfect. "Thank you, God." 

Put me in nature. 

Put me on a beach with the sunrise and a cup of coffee and the scent of the mighty ocean.

Let me drive through the mountains in breathtaking splendor.

Let me sit by the water with a book in the sunshine or glide across the water on a paddle board of a calm lake with the only sounds being the birds in the air and the gentle splash of the water from the oar.

Surround me in the beauty of nature and my soul is refreshed.

Wow!

I did it! I pulled off simply elegant for my booth at the bridal show!!

Finding several eye-catching pieces, I couldn't wait to put my vision together this morning, pre-staging before the big event.

My task was quite the challenge. I could have gone to wedding rental companies for fine linens, dinnerware and decor, but I didn't have time. Every single rental place flipping closes at 5:00 or 6:00 p.m. I'm so busy, I don't have time to slip away. Plus, there's the delicate balance of spending money on rental stuff to use, but then return. I chose to find fabulous pieces I can keep and reuse.

So ... finding pieces at multiple stores and tapping into creativity, I pulled it all together by spending only $149!!!!

Sounds cheap. It's isn't. Wait until you see my pictures from the bridal show. I found fabulous pieces at different stores. Hoping they'd pull together beautifully, to have it pull together far more wonderful than I imagined.

The "Wow's!" came from the new management team and the ladies from the City who stopped by for a meeting today. Not a "Wow, that's nice" to make me feel good, but genuine "Wow, that looks fantastic! Hey ____, look what Dawn did!" Everyone staring taking in each piece and commenting on my creation.

I'm proud of it and most proud I did it so far under budget while getting to keep it all for future staging.

WINNER!

Elegantly Simple

My first bridal show is coming up and I've been tasked with setting up a booth and creating a space to attract interested brides.

I currently have nothing and I have one week to pull fabulous together. 

Confidence is one thing. Creating a space when I don't know what competition I am up against booth-wise, with uncertainty of how much I am allowed to spend on top of an already really expensive booth fee, I am tapping into running out of time and while fully stimulated by the challenge. 

This could be a reality show competition.

I'm going for elegantly simple, the twin of the wealthy simply elegant. 

Where on earth do I begin? What key elements do I need to respectfully create a space? Taping into creativity I search for what I have around me. Okay, nothing. 

Thrilled to have a marketing department who created several pieces for me to use, I was able to make the necessary changes I wanted and tomorrow they go to print.

The focal point theme and inspiration for my booth came down to a fabulous fabric I found at a fabric store and an ornate mirror I was just given from one of my brides. 

I am going to create a space with a couple unique pieces that will capture ones attention as they are walking by. The very way I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw a basket of Amnesia Roses. 

My goal is to pique interest with a few stunning pieces and if I can do that on a fraction of the cost of not going to high end wedding rental company and use pieces I can use at my venue after the fact, I will have won at my own personal challenge.

The Amnesia Rose

White tulips have been my signature flower for decades. It is still a flower of classic elegance.

Strolling through a lovely florist shop, my pace came to a halt. As I stood there and stared at this rare flower in awe of its beauty, I asked, "What do you call this rose?" That is when I learned of the Amnesia Rose.

Grey-lavender with pale green tips, when placed next to accent flowers, the Amnesia Rose changes color.

... and I fell in love.