Performance Review

"So, when are we doing my performance review?" I asked the General Manager today. He mentioned it weeks ago and I kind of felt bad for him, I'm sure he wasn't looking forward to doing mine. 

We share an office and have become very good friends. He is kind and thoughtful and me, I'm kinda bossy and direct with uber strong work ethics. If co-workers don't try to keep up, I have a tendency to run them over. I've never played well with low performers. 

Dominic says I set the standards for excellence. See! We make a good team.

He said, "I already did it." "Where is it? You mean you're not going to sit down with me and tell me I'm bossy, I push too hard, and I don't play nice?" I say laughingly in jest, but we both know there are underlying truths.

The hardest thing for my personality to work with is low-performers and that sums up most of our team in leadership positions. He provides me freedom to do what I want and a safe place to call it like I see it and in return, I make him look amazing by making all the money. He's earning his wings in heaven putting up with me. 

Anxious to see what he wrote and ready to debate if I'm not pleased with his review, I read all the categories and my score ranking was:

EXCEPTIONAL

He listed my strengths and didn't say I wear him out at all. 

Before the end of January last week, I already beat my revenue goals for all of 2020, which was doubled from last years revenue goals and I will continue pushing 11 more months, because I want to see what I am capable of making happen. 

Pre-approval

I am ready to buy a house.

What part of town do I want to live in? House or condo? What size property do I want if I choose a home? What is it I want the house to look like and feel like? What price range do I want to be in? There are SO many factors when deciding to buy a home.

Going through the pre-approval process today, I was quite stunned to learn I am pre-approved for over 2x what I was originally looking at buying a home for. Blessed to be in a great position, this is where wisdom comes in. 

I'm sticking to my guns and I want a low house payment. I'm thinking a pretty, little doll house on postage stamp property, with flower gardens all around, perhaps a garden, and a white picket fence. Luxury on the inside with renovations to personalize the home with bells and whistles. 

I like stashing away paychecks. I like knowing I can buy what I want and go where I want with financial freedom and not needing a credit card.

It makes me think of my Jeep. I drive a Grand Cherokee that has been paid off for years. It's comfortable, dependable, and I still like it. The windshield still has a crack and I believe in the rule of thumb, rocks only hit perfect windshields. The back light is still busted when I backed into a tree and if that was replaced how on earth would I know my SUV from all the others in a parking lot?

While others drive the latest and greatest, I prefer knowing I can buy any luxury SUV I want, but I still choose no car payment. 

People live maxed out for status and show, buying and chasing happiness. Me, I don't care what anyone has, I'm already happy, content and calm. I prefer new experiences to constantly upgrading what I already have.

This is where I say, "Lord, You find the perfect home for me."

Yoga Class

There were a few chuckles at my expense when I mentioned I was going to a yoga class today, chair yoga.

With a page full of classes from early in the morning to evening and never attending a yoga class beyond what Netflix/Hulu offers, yoga can be tough and I wanted to start off easy.

Chair yoga, while others may scoff, was an enjoyable and relaxing class. It was a large room with one whole wall of windows for natural lighting. With the lights off and spa-like music playing, it really made a relaxed setting. 

When you think chair yoga, think more, stretching. Stretching is good though. It was like stretching to the Calm app, relaxing and enjoyable. Very zen.

One does not sparkle though by the end of the hour, but I felt stretched and good.

The ladies were so welcoming and friendly. As I am in the class with thoughts racing through my mind... remembering my youth in the gym, in high impact step aerobics classes, kickboxing class, and classes in general that you dress to look super cute and keep up costing pulled muscles for days. Everything was a competition then from the outfits to out-performing others. There's a season for that and I rocked that season from my 20's to early 40's. 

I smile at these sweet ladies around me today and give them kudos for their dedication. They get up and get moving and after many conversations, they do lots of other classes together, too. There's no competition in the room, just women enjoying themselves, encouraging others, and that's a pleasant and positive environment.

Perhaps, chair yoga isn't my thing, but I'm having fun trying classes and being willing to do something I've never done before.

A Date

I've always gone on dates with my daughters and still do; now, I have dates with Sofia, too.

Excited to say bye to her momma and ready with basic necessities, a backpack (2 band-aids inside) and a box of Frozen band-aids, we are off for an afternoon of fun. When you're two years old, the car wash, picking lunch up at Chick a Fila then to Gamma's house is the BEST!! We sang, "We're going to grandma's house, we're going to grandma's house..." She loves to sing.

When we arrived, I let her take the lead to give her the time to do what she wants to do and when she wants to do it. When your two, here's how the date goes:

Set out lunch, she likes us to sit down together and takes a bite or two.

Run off to my bedroom to get into the jewelry box and spend time trying things on.

Drag out doll houses and sit down and play house.

Runs back into the kitchen, "wOw! sIt gAmMa!" Take a few bites of food.

Go downstairs and pick out today's favorite pairs of Gamma's shoes. Go through the storage room, just looking at everything.

It's time for her dolls to take a bath in the bathtub. I drop in a couple glow sticks in the water, complements of Papa, hair conditioner is so soft on hands and by the 40th time she said,"mOrE pEaSe" the tub was soapy with the fragrant scent of hair conditioner. She swam in the tub, played with the bubbles and glow sticks, washed her dolls hair, and when it was time to get out, I bundled her up warm in the chair under a blanket and gave her mac & cheese to fill her belly. 

She watches her videos on my iPhone in the car going home and I hug her and kiss her, tell her I had so much fun with her and she's my best friend. That I love her and next week we will have another date.

She ran over for another hug and said, "A dAtE!" She knows her mommy & daddy goes on dates and Gamma & Sofia have dates, too.

I Would Do Anything For Love

Watching my sweet grandbabies last night, Sofia pulled the kitchen chair to the stove and wanted to eat mac & cheese out of the pan. Mac & cheese shells fit perfectly over fingertips when your 2, and it makes them super fun to eat.

Eat them, not share them. "wAnNa bItE gAmMa?" 

I am crazy, madly, wildly in love with my grandbabies and I would do anything for love, but I won't eat mac & cheese shells off little fingers that are constantly in her nose. No, I won't do that!

We did share a 1st magical moment last night. As we were standing at the stove, her on the chair dining eating mac & cheese, we stood face to face laughing and talking when a song from Frozen came on.

"Let it snow, let it snow ..." 

Neither of us knows the other lyrics, but we nailed these three words every time it came on. Looking at each other in the eyes and singing face to face with her was an awesome moment.

"No, I really don't want a bite."

BLINK

One minute they are a toddler for what feels like forever, BLINK. Then, a teenager that feels like forever, BLINK. Suddenly, they are married and inviting me over for dinner. 

It does feel that surreal. 

It was a pleasant surprise to get an invitation to come over for dinner. Brooke made a pot roast with potatoes and carrots and a delicious gravy, I brought over dessert. 

It's been a while since I've had a pot roast and I forgot how good it is and the beef gravy was the perfect touch. Cooked to perfection, Brooke is an excellent host. I knew upon invitation, she'd have every detail covered and she'd slip easily into the role of a graceful host. 

Pulling out her prettiest crystal stemware, everything was prepared for my arrival. 

Fun conversation with my daughter and son-in-law, delicious food, Alex cleared the table and served dessert, a cinnamon coffee cake with coconut milk chocolate ice cream and a dollop of whip cream.

It was a lovely evening, thank you Brooke & Alex. xoxo

Strangers on a Plane

I hoped for the best as I boarded the plane and walked down the long narrow aisle to my seat, hoping the strangers I'd be sitting pretty close to for the next couple hours were decent. 

Thankfully, I got really lucky on both my flights and sat next to really nice people who were pleasant and I was able to strike light conversations with.

Well, there was one. Bubbly and chatty by nature, I just hoped she'd make the time go by quicker with her constant chatter. We covered the basics, "Are you going home or on vacation?" "Personal or pleasure?" "Oh, what part of Florida?"  

I learned a lot quickly. When, how, and why she lives in Florida. Why she doesn't like it, her kids and grand kids and on and on. I know what she does for a living, that her husband sitting across the aisle from us can't stay off his phone and it's a problem for her. He looks at it first thing in the morning and he slips it into his pocket as soon as he gets out of bed. I can tell he's mastered tuning her out and she laughs it off. 

When she came up for breath, she asked if I had kids and where's my husband? "I don't have a husband, I've been single for over two decades." She sighed and gave me a look of pity. "Oh, you're divorced" and there's that look of pity, again.  

Actually, I consider myself single not divorced. I may have gotten a divorce almost 23 years ago, but I'm a professional single. That was decades ago.

"Does their dad help?" Here we go... "Their dads are deceased" I shared. This comment scares people. One is a tragedy, but two is sketchy and I can see the emotions of confusion cross her face, she probably watches Dateline. There's her sad pity face, again. I answered her because she's asked a question, the answers do not define me. 

Her expression is annoying me and her pity is ignorance. I should take a photo of her expression and show her, her judgment of me is causing me to assess her situation... 

[In my mind I'm thinking] "Sharon (I don't remember her name, but she could be a Sharon), what I've learned is that you hate Florida. You were laid off and your husband had a dream to live where it's warm and you are not happy you left your children and grandchildren to live where you haven't liked it for six years. You want to move back, but he doesn't want to. You miss your kids and your grand kids and you had to threaten to go see them when he decided to go with you. He clearly calls the shots. Your husband who cannot stay off his phone and acts like he doesn't know you, slipped to the back of the plane to stretch his legs out in the empty seats the whole flight and hasn't really acknowledged you. While you're sweet and kind of ditsy, he is totally shady and you should probably check his phone. You may have a husband, but looks as if you've settled and you aren't really happy. You can laugh and chuckle at your husband's phone interest, but you must worry and that has to hurt every day. You have a husband, live in Florida, and life is settled and predictable. Your life is decided, isn't what you want and I feel sorry for you.

You see, Sharon, being single is a blank canvas. I live on my own terms and can color inside and outside the lines of my life and boldly embrace not knowing what comes next. I do what I want, when I want, and how I want. Being single is an unpredictable and wildly beautiful adventure."