I do believe it's been easy for me to trust God in my life, because I am blessed with an earthly father that I've always trusted and love dearly. I've always been a daddy's girl with a strong father who was my 1st hero. This set a place in my heart of what a man is and what love and feeling safe feels like.
Being a quiet and strong personality, I've always known I was the stronger one in my relationships. Wanting and waiting on the sidelines for a man to step up and me ready and sliding in when I knew they couldn't. Wouldn't also means couldn't.
It was Sweetest Day and we were standing in a beautiful home in a picturesque neighborhood. My girlfriend, our realtor, said, "Are you sure you want to make an offer?" She knows me and she saw this odd expression of I was saying yes, but a wave of holy smokes this is a huge decision being made so quickly was more my expression.
In all my home-buying bravado, I felt like I couldn't make the decision, and it needed to be made instantaneously because we both had to race out the door to two professional appointments. When I couldn't sort through my thoughts, I stepped into David's arms, wrapped my arms around him, and put my head on his shoulder.
He wrapped his arms around me in such a way, I knew I was loved, adored, and protected. It was the same safety as stepping into my dad's arms. An embrace that was pure trust and I said, "I need for you to make this decision."
We made an offer on the house, signed all the agreement letter documents together, with an offer pretty good over asking price. We didn't find out until late that night it wasn't the highest offer. It's okay, it wasn't meant to be.
Do you know what I got even more on Sweetest Day? When I came home from a wedding and walked in the door, there sat on my kitchen counter was beautiful roses and a love note he surprised me with before I could jump in the shower and he came over.
What I got on Sweetest Day was the realization that while I know I love him, admire, respect, and trust him, I've absolutely and genuinely for the first time in my life trust him to lead our relationship and I am nestled in his arms allowed to simply be a woman.
This isn't where I crumble my any means! I trust him because I know he loves me and respects me, and I know how much my happiness means to him. Like my heavenly Father and my earthly father, I found a man I love, trust, and absolutely respect, which makes ALL the difference.
There you are... my soul has been looking for you.
