Christmas Preparation

Christmas preparation is a grand production and I am pleased to be right on schedule:

  - Our home decorated the day after Thanksgiving begins the start of the season, check.
  - Christmas cards in the mail by November 30th, check.
  - Most of the Christmas shopping bought and paid for before December 1st, check.

I have learned this schedule allows my days to be filled with Christmas music, downtime to watch holiday movies from the comforts of home, walk through shops with beautifully decorated Christmas trees, and plan Christmas events I want to attend for a full month.

Saturday, David and I went to the quaint little town of Cambridge, Ohio with 92 life size scenes of Dickens Christmas. The courthouse was the center of attention with over 55,000 lights choreographed to Christmas music.

We walked in and out of little shops and found it odd to say, "Merry Christmas!" as we would walk out, store owners wishing us well wishes for stopping by their shop.

Walking through town holding hands, Christmas music filled the air and it felt as if we walked back in time.

This is how I want my Christmas season spent. Not in the chaos of shopping, but in enjoyment of breathing in Christmas.

It feels good to know I still have time to peruse upcoming Christmas events and make the very most of December.

Two Dinners = I Could EXPLODE!

Ladies, it is an unspoken, known rule in womanhood that we lavishly praise the man in our life for random acts of kindness and service we would like to see again. Somehow our daily acts of service fall under normal life and theirs ... theirs are worthy of praise.

This is where my dilemma beings.

David had two sets of plans for last night: time with Madeline or steak night with "the guys" in Thursday evening tradition. I threw a wrench in all plans when I learned of a "Light Up Downtown" event was taking place with fireworks as soon as I got off work.

It was a choice.

Then I learned all the events were happening while I was stuck at work, even the fireworks, canceling plans on our end.

MY VERSION

It's Taco Salad night at the mission, yum! Perfect timing. Eat dinner at the mission, David will eat dinner elsewhere and I can figure out something for Brooke. After all, I worked 7:00 a.m. - 7:00 p.m. and cooking was not on my agenda after a 12 hour shift.

Dinner was delish! As I am driving home David texts and asks me when I will be home, I called and said in moments. I see the grill is out and realize, my sweetheart has *surprised* me with dinner.

As I walk in the house, not only has he made dinner, he has both our plates prepared, the table set and every dinner detail covered. I am faced with a fast decision, confess I have eaten and squelch any future dinner surprises or eat with him (I am already full).

He asks the challenging question, "have you eaten?" "Only a bite of taco salad," is my safe reply. (Alarms and sirens are not going off in heaven I have lied!)

"Would you like pickles? I took two (little round sweet pickles, probably a dead giveaway).

Perhaps if I remove the bun off the burger it will cut down on a 2nd plate of food in my already full stomach.

I forgot to add, he even went to the store and picked up chips, dip/salsa and beverage to complement our meal. Anything negative would be perceived as insult to the act of kindness/service.

Dear God, another bite and I will explode.

At the end of our meal (my 2nd) he states, "You already ate dinner didn't you?" [The challenge laid on the table.]

HIS VERSION

Knowing I worked 12 hours, he steps up to welcome me home with all things dinner done.

He sees me remove my bun off the burger to get as little down as possible, nibble at a chip, smile and appreciate him. He knows full well that I have already eaten dinner and more like a plate, not just a bite because he knows I love Taco Salad.

He watches me. When I cannot possible eat another thing he calls me out.

I fall on the sword of appreciating him and fear of him going to the store, cooking dinner, setting the table, preparing all the details of our plates will be smashed forever in all eternity.

Somehow he knew from the start and watched me squirm and be miserable eating two dinners because I lied saying I only took a bite of Taco Salad.

That was mean.

Worn out from such a long work day, tapped out in emotional drain from all I dealt with throughout the day, ready to explode with two dinners inside me, judged for lying ... technically, my dishonest answer of protection to him certainly falls under a category more of sainthood versus shady liar.

He chose to forgo other plans for the evening to take care of me after a long day. That was incredibly sweet. Letting me eat two plates of food when he pretty much guessed I had already eaten was not sweet.

Just you wait until the day the roles are reversed. If I get a catch a scent, hint or clue he has already eaten, I will fall into the role of grand sainthood, love and servanthood and stuff him like a turkey!!

He needs to come to the table for as long as it takes until I forget last night, hungry and ravenous.

A Very Happy Girl!

HOORAY and congratulations, Brooke got her drivers license! A milestone into freedom.

She was over the moon and of course we stopped for a celebration breakfast before I took her into school for the day. Unbeknownst to me Brooke was coordinating her plan.

David stopped into the rescue mission when I was feeding the public and asked me why Brooke had text him to find out what time he would be home? He text her back asking "why" and she just said, "just asking."

Brooke's plan:

    #1 - Ensure David will be home = a 2nd vehicle will ensure her rights to my vehicle.

    #2 - She text me and asks me to bring home $20 so she can get something to eat when I home. Translation: Bring me $20 and your car.

Stopping by the bank, David came in a few minutes behind me. Brooke wasn't there and he asked if she had already left?? I assured him she was on her way home with Alex now to get the car and go on her first adventure as a licensed driver, primarily without me.

A bit frantic, I was surprised when David expressed how upset he almost was if she had left and he didn't see her off for the first time. I saw the close-call anxiousness and I knew he meant it. I pulled him into my arms and kissed him telling him how sweet he is to genuinely want to be a part of this milestone with her. My heart fell in love over and over, again.

Cash in her pocket, keys in the ignition, Alex in the passenger seat, she is ready to jet set the heck away from us! David prattling off a mile long list of safety reminders and me snapping photos and trying to videotape this moment, Brooke pulling out of the garage and closing the garage door to get the heck away from two crazy parents!

She had a ball. Congratulations, sis!

We Date, Every Day

In the midst of a wonderful life, relationships are tough.

I've learned that forgiveness, forgiveness, and more forgiveness is necessary for not just the big things in life, but in the daily little things that chip away at our resolve.

David said it best when he text me, "We are both with strong personalities and both are very sensitive ... which sometimes caused issues with hurt feelings for one or the other, sometimes both."

He shared his heart, open and raw and filled with love he reminded me that we date, every day. Our "normal" which isn't mundane but exciting and adventurous.

It's true. We date, every day.

We are so in tune with one another, so much alike, on the same wave length in an invisible realm that not only keeps us together, but my thoughts become his thoughts and vice versa.

David and I can sit down at a restaurant and order the same meal and beverage (of course we argue over who came up with the selection first and call the other a copy cat). Every time.

We were just at a large mall in Cleveland yesterday, walked the entire mall in and out of tons of shops. As we walked into the last store before we left, David walked up to one specific item (out of the whole mall) and made a comment he really like it. Sometimes, I just shake my head. I told him, "That is what I bought Jason & Melissa last year for Christmas."

Before that, driving to the mall I realized I was in need of a cup off coffee. Knowing a McDonald's was a mile up the road, my plan was to get close and ask him to turn in. I wanted a hot cup off coffee and I knew he would like an iced coffee.

Seconds later, he asked if I wanted a coffee. I shared that was my plan, but I was waiting until we got closer. I said a McDonald's was just up the road. It was my idea first, my treat. He argued he said it first, his treat. He was the driver and closest to the drive-up window so he paid.

We are highly sensitive to each others sighs and blinks. We are so in tune with each others heart, desires, shortcomings and tones, you take two strong, like-minded personalities and we often clash like the titans. We love each other endlessly and most days are carefree, fun and over the top adventurous. Some days we don't even like each other and love does become a choice tapping into forgiveness and patience which doesn't come easy.

We do date every day and I love that about our life together.

A Sunday together going to church, home for lunch, shopping in Cleveland, he wants to take me to dinner (because every day is a date). I chose to go home and make dinner so we can watch a movie together, which ended up being a delicious meal and a classic comedy, "What About Bob?"

David knows my hearts desires, hears me when I say, "I need this ... from you" and steps up within moments like a rock star.

When the movie was over he suggested ice cream. My favorite ice cream ever is Dark Chocolate Peppermint w/coconut from Cold Stone Creamery; however, they only serve it during the Christmas season. A quick phone call confirmed they have it and we were off for ice cream.

I can see our life together, two lives blending seamlessly into one life. Two spunky old people who perhaps debate most any topic, lost without the other, becoming one heartbeat. He is my heart.

Dating every day, what a treasure you are.

Forgiveness, what a treasure you are.

Love, what a  treasure you are.

Love is a choice.

A Dream in a Dream

Last night I was dreaming. I was so tired and worn out, but I felt a presence and barely opened my eyes to see a warm and loving familiar face close to mine. I smiled and closed my eyes succumbing to sleep, again.

Was it a dream or was it actually real? I forced my eyes open and saw the same face patiently waiting while I slept and I sleepily touched the soft cheek and said, "I am glad it was you, I thought I was dreaming."

Then I woke up.

I remember what I have forgotten.

Thanksgiving 2015

Some days I wake up and I know the mission in front of me. It takes careful coordinating, exact timing, nonstop work and it requires 100% of staying on task. 

A lot of productions as of late. 

Thanksgiving Day 2015.  

It was quite a production and it did come together beautifully and everything was truly delicious. Garlic & Herb Turkey, homemade Broccoli Cheese soup, Green Bean Casserole, Sweet Shoepeg Corn, Red Skinned Mashed Potatoes, Stuffing and Gravy, Chunky Cinnamon Applesauce, Deviled Eggs, Pineapple, and Dinner rolls w/Sea Salt Butter & Blackberry Pie (complements of Amish Country). 

Mariah said it was perfect. 

Clean as you cook.

Much to clean up. 

When all was done I had 15 minutes to sit down with a cup of coffee and watch a small piece of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade then off to the rescue mission to feed the hungry in Canton. 

As I greeted guests as they came in to eat saying, "Happy Thanksgiving!" one guy said, "I don't get it, why does everyone say Happy Thanksgiving?" I said, "We are going to cover that in devotions." I read the proclamation from President Abraham Lincoln proclaiming we celebrate Thanksgiving the fourth Thursday of the month of November in thanks to God for all things ... in the midst of the Civil War. It was a good read if you have not read it before.  

What a day! The good news is there is so much food left I don't have to cook for a week.

Tiffany & Co.

Wishing I could slip away for days at a luxury resort to bask in sunshine with the sound of the ocean (or a fabulous swimming pool and float with drink in hand) and a warm breeze of salty air for a couple days of rest, relaxation, rejuvenation, and time.

It has been many years (4+) since I have done what brings me great pleasure.

A resort spa getaway. In the midst of tending to everyone's (hundreds) needs, pulling off the Gala, Thanksgiving and Christmas at the mission and in my home I need to be a little more self-focused. Good grief most everyone in my life will allow me to deplete completely and never step up to tend to their own needs.

Day two of rest and relaxation is all I get and was met with road bumps of frustration. Keep in mind, I have only two days to rejuvenate quickly for sanity sake and it included many errands and dreaded Thanksgiving grocery shopping.

Quiet. I need time. Hours of alone, quiet time.

Not a single person needing anything from me.

Brooke wakes me up at 5:30 a.m. to ask if she can sleep in and me drive to her school since she had nightmares all night. I was aggravated instantly for a couple reasons:

  1 - She watched scary movies all day the day before; of course, she would have nightmares.

  2 - She thought nothing of waking me up at 5:30 a.m. on my day off. So my day began.

  3 - I wanted her to to slip out the door at 7:00 a.m. and be gone, which is her regular schedule. Now, I wasn't getting desperately needed alone time until 7:45 a.m. and I had to drive her to school.

I get home and Mariah is in the kitchen. I learned she was off work today, too. Seriously?!

My resolve was slipping and she questioned the look of disappointment on my face, then was instantly offended when I said I took the day off and needed some alone time.

There is not a single thing in the world wrong to knowing when you need quiet time. They should be grateful it isn't alcohol or drugs I turn to. Lesser people with no responsibility in life turn to these things.

I have reached beyond burnout and quite honestly, sick of most everyone. I have embraced I am perfectly fine not budging for the next person who says, "I need ..." A dangerous attitude for the needy, high maintenance, energy-sucking population my role serves.

Truth be told, 95% live off the system and do absolutely nothing for themselves. It is a known very small percentage we actually make a difference for. Learning about our rescue mission (not all rescue missions), we enable the useless to be more useless with no boundaries or expectations. It is a horrible atmosphere for me with a strong work ethic.

My gosh, I need out.

I know God said take care of the poor, feed the needy. He meant that for those who cannot help themselves for a host of real reasons. This is not the population we serve. We serve the already sucking the system, entitled, and will take and continue to ask for more population who absolutely refuses to step up and contribute in their own life. Be responsible? No way.

Geez, what a rant.

In the midst of burnout and desperate attempts to rejuvenate in pitifully low expectations of simple quiet time that clearly offends those I live with ... the heavens opened, angels sangs and suddenly I was filled with awe ...

*GASP!*

A stunning pair of Tiffany & Co. sunglasses.

Merry Christmas to me.