My thoughts are turning to Christmas. Thanksgiving dinner first, but Christmas, too.
Brooke said yesterday, "Mom, I want to say something because I love you ... (Uh oh) ... you need to leave the rescue mission. You come home exhausted and unhappy every day dealing with so much drama and it is wearing on you."
I remember the last time I heard those words I was working at WHM. My girls brought it to my attention when I no longer smiled. Brooke is bringing the weight of the stress to my attention, again.
I feel the same way.
It is 7:00 a.m. and I have the whole day open to me.
Thank you, God.
Monday, November 23, 2015
Sunday, November 22, 2015
Thank God It's Over!
Months of planning, the last two weeks of all my focus, the last couple days of 12 hour days putting all the finishing touches on the rescue missions Holiday Gala, thank God it's over! And, I mean that.
The venue was beautiful. The triple Christmas trees decorated with a photographer set up for capturing photos of dinner guests.
Aesthetically I was very pleased, that part I controlled.
I am not going to nitpick the things I could not control completely, such as the registration process which wasn't even completely set up when dinner guests poured through the door 20 minutes before it was supposed to even open. The auctioneer who veered off track with the flow of the evening agenda and didn't live auction the Rescue Mission Christmas Catalog, which left much money on the table. The entertainer from the off-Broadway show STOMP, I felt did more self-promoting than mission-focused. My team who I should have known better was not capable of graciously handling the registration/check-out process in style and class. (Yes, I said it.) Each of them knew what their role was going into the evening. Two claimed they didn't know what their role was. Another two kept disappearing and not staying on task (I hate hunting down people to tell them, man your post!). One who wasn't in her comfort zone stepped back and kept asking, "Do you need help?" I knew limitations, but I still expect others to step up and give 100%.
I can have everything picked up and every detail present and ready, but I cannot do all things once the production is is motion and I am depending on others to fill a role.
As the host of the Gala I tried to oversee everything from keeping the agenda on timeline, assist with the auction process capturing bidder numbers, step up and fill in for the cork pull (during the final call and my set two people sat in their chairs as if that wasn't their responsibility for the evening), be present for registration/checkout, as well graciously meet and speak with guests.
I am glad it is over.
Today begins a couple days off for me of rest, relaxation and rejuvenation. It is needed.
The venue was beautiful. The triple Christmas trees decorated with a photographer set up for capturing photos of dinner guests.
The tables were beautifully set and I was especially pleased with the centerpiece. The conference center had just bought the glass candle holders, but it was a bit plain with nothing underneath. I ordered some fresh cedar and picked up pine cones and a sprig of silver splash and it came together beautifully.
The cork pull was a lot of fun. Bottles ranging from wine purchased from the George Washington estate, brought in from Napa Valley all the way down to Boone's Farm for a good laugh.
Silent auction tables were filled with a variety of items from a beautiful Kate Spade purse, golfing at country clubs, hotel stays, fine dining, spa-la-la'ing and more.
I was pleased with each auction item description I had to individually create looked beautiful on the table.
Dinner was beautifully presented. I went with an island theme to complement the evenings entertainment. Pictured is a Coconut Lime Salmon, Jerk Chicken and I really don't know what the side dish was.
Dessert a key lime mini pie and a chocolate mousse in an edible chocolate cup. It truly was delish!
I even ensured the OSU vs. Michigan game was available to dinner guests in the lobby.
Aesthetically I was very pleased, that part I controlled.
I am not going to nitpick the things I could not control completely, such as the registration process which wasn't even completely set up when dinner guests poured through the door 20 minutes before it was supposed to even open. The auctioneer who veered off track with the flow of the evening agenda and didn't live auction the Rescue Mission Christmas Catalog, which left much money on the table. The entertainer from the off-Broadway show STOMP, I felt did more self-promoting than mission-focused. My team who I should have known better was not capable of graciously handling the registration/check-out process in style and class. (Yes, I said it.) Each of them knew what their role was going into the evening. Two claimed they didn't know what their role was. Another two kept disappearing and not staying on task (I hate hunting down people to tell them, man your post!). One who wasn't in her comfort zone stepped back and kept asking, "Do you need help?" I knew limitations, but I still expect others to step up and give 100%.
I can have everything picked up and every detail present and ready, but I cannot do all things once the production is is motion and I am depending on others to fill a role.
As the host of the Gala I tried to oversee everything from keeping the agenda on timeline, assist with the auction process capturing bidder numbers, step up and fill in for the cork pull (during the final call and my set two people sat in their chairs as if that wasn't their responsibility for the evening), be present for registration/checkout, as well graciously meet and speak with guests.
I am glad it is over.
Today begins a couple days off for me of rest, relaxation and rejuvenation. It is needed.
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
3:30 a.m.
I am unsure if my eyes opened first or my brain was already running through details of the upcoming Holiday Gala I am hosting, but the clock said 3:30 a.m. I am awake and need to vent.
Chest pressure. Racing thoughts. I run through my mental checklist doting my "i's" and crossing my "t's", leaving no leaf un-turned in Gala planning. Have I missed a leaf? A small tiny detail that could make a ripple effect.
I have 1-1/2 weeks until the grand crescendo of my party. Time is still on my side to fine-tune,thank you, God!
At the mission, my freezers and pantries are bursting in donations. Over capacity. Sounds dreamy being donation-based, I know! The behind-the-scenes-not-so-dreamy details is the attitudes of those working under me are overwhelmed and frazzled in this overflow. This is a result of being a tad out of their comfort zone. Oh well.
They are sick of stockpiles of donations coming in. They haven't seen anything yet, wait till it is a week before Thanksgiving.
Every day, all day, emails and phone calls blow my office into a tizzy of requests to serve Thanksgiving Day. My graciousness is slipping and I really want to say, "What about the other 364 days of the year we feed the homeless?" I know that sounds awful.
I work six days a week and pretty much every flipping holiday and for some reason for two months I am flooded daily by people who want to help one day out of the year. Thanksgiving Day.
Oh, the entitlement and theft in this population that works for me at the mission. I know it will never end.
The attitudes, the bickering. Do they realize a 4-hour workday is nothing? Imagine putting in a 4-hour day and walking out the door with zero work responsibility until your next shift. No holidays and weekends off. My patience is nothing with them.
I pressed charges against a kid at the high school this week for taking pictures of Brooke, photo shopping them onto sexual pictures and texting them to other students. Bad move.
I am one pissed off mom. At the battle line ready for war.
Finneaus has fleas.
Brooke's new med's are working well, but I found out will cost over $300 per month and my insurance doesn't cover it.
What else?
The fighting and bad attitudes at the mission. Staff, residents and dinner guests. Every day, all day. I am certain I am not the gentle spirit they believe I should be. Perhaps, everyone needs to tap into personal ownership of life responsibilities.
I work my ass off and give 100% in every area of my life. Unfortunately, this is not a good combination to be surrounded daily by those who do little to zero for their own lives and ultimately effects my life in their constant taking mentalities.
I am tired, stressed and ready for battle.
My plate is full, my resolve slipping and I am in direct communication with God.
This is a bad week, temper tantrum rant in the midst of a very good life.
A winning lottery ticket and a long vacation would help.
Chest pressure. Racing thoughts. I run through my mental checklist doting my "i's" and crossing my "t's", leaving no leaf un-turned in Gala planning. Have I missed a leaf? A small tiny detail that could make a ripple effect.
I have 1-1/2 weeks until the grand crescendo of my party. Time is still on my side to fine-tune,thank you, God!
At the mission, my freezers and pantries are bursting in donations. Over capacity. Sounds dreamy being donation-based, I know! The behind-the-scenes-not-so-dreamy details is the attitudes of those working under me are overwhelmed and frazzled in this overflow. This is a result of being a tad out of their comfort zone. Oh well.
They are sick of stockpiles of donations coming in. They haven't seen anything yet, wait till it is a week before Thanksgiving.
Every day, all day, emails and phone calls blow my office into a tizzy of requests to serve Thanksgiving Day. My graciousness is slipping and I really want to say, "What about the other 364 days of the year we feed the homeless?" I know that sounds awful.
I work six days a week and pretty much every flipping holiday and for some reason for two months I am flooded daily by people who want to help one day out of the year. Thanksgiving Day.
Oh, the entitlement and theft in this population that works for me at the mission. I know it will never end.
The attitudes, the bickering. Do they realize a 4-hour workday is nothing? Imagine putting in a 4-hour day and walking out the door with zero work responsibility until your next shift. No holidays and weekends off. My patience is nothing with them.
I pressed charges against a kid at the high school this week for taking pictures of Brooke, photo shopping them onto sexual pictures and texting them to other students. Bad move.
I am one pissed off mom. At the battle line ready for war.
Finneaus has fleas.
Brooke's new med's are working well, but I found out will cost over $300 per month and my insurance doesn't cover it.
What else?
The fighting and bad attitudes at the mission. Staff, residents and dinner guests. Every day, all day. I am certain I am not the gentle spirit they believe I should be. Perhaps, everyone needs to tap into personal ownership of life responsibilities.
I work my ass off and give 100% in every area of my life. Unfortunately, this is not a good combination to be surrounded daily by those who do little to zero for their own lives and ultimately effects my life in their constant taking mentalities.
I am tired, stressed and ready for battle.
My plate is full, my resolve slipping and I am in direct communication with God.
This is a bad week, temper tantrum rant in the midst of a very good life.
A winning lottery ticket and a long vacation would help.
Sunday, November 8, 2015
Sweet 16
I remember how magical 16 years old sounded to me almost 30 years ago and my youngest turned that magical number today.
The year she can get her drivers license.
The year she can get that job at Hot Topic she has wanted for two years now.
More freedoms.
As she woke up, I started playing "16 Candles" by The Crests and was surprised she had never heard that song before, but quickly loved it.
My mom sent her the song, "Happy Birthday Sweet 16" by Neil Sedaka.
Turning 16 is an age songs were made for.
As we are driving in the car to church to start her special day with David and Alex and I wanted to set a fun tone and played the Neil Sedaka song for her. She asked me to play 16 Candles.
Happy birthday, happy birthday, baby
Oh, I love you so
A wave of emotion hit me (which is the opposite of the tone I wanted in the car for celebration sake).
In the midst of her special day, someone important isn't here and my heart broke for her. Grief can blindside at any given moment.
The song filled the air.
My heart broke for her and tears wouldn't cooperate and stop.
Happy sweet 16.
The year she can get her drivers license.
The year she can get that job at Hot Topic she has wanted for two years now.
More freedoms.
As she woke up, I started playing "16 Candles" by The Crests and was surprised she had never heard that song before, but quickly loved it.
My mom sent her the song, "Happy Birthday Sweet 16" by Neil Sedaka.
Turning 16 is an age songs were made for.
As we are driving in the car to church to start her special day with David and Alex and I wanted to set a fun tone and played the Neil Sedaka song for her. She asked me to play 16 Candles.
Happy birthday, happy birthday, baby
Oh, I love you so
A wave of emotion hit me (which is the opposite of the tone I wanted in the car for celebration sake).
In the midst of her special day, someone important isn't here and my heart broke for her. Grief can blindside at any given moment.
The song filled the air.
Sixteen candles make a lovely light
But not as bright as your eyes tonight
(As your eyes tonight, oh)
Blow out the candles
Make your wish come true
For I'll be wishing that you love me, too
(That you love me, too)
Breathing and redirecting thoughts became a battle I could not win.(As your eyes tonight, oh)
Blow out the candles
Make your wish come true
For I'll be wishing that you love me, too
(That you love me, too)
My heart broke for her and tears wouldn't cooperate and stop.
You're only sixteen (sixteen)
But you're my teenage queen
(You're my queen)
You're the prettiest
Loveliest girl I've ever seen
(I've ever seen, oh)
But you're my teenage queen
(You're my queen)
You're the prettiest
Loveliest girl I've ever seen
(I've ever seen, oh)
Sixteen candles in my heart will glow
For ever and ever for I love you so
(For I love you so)
Brooke had a wonderful day.For ever and ever for I love you so
(For I love you so)
Happy sweet 16.
Ruggedly Handsome
On a beautiful autumn day, we go out and play.
... with a ruggedly handsome man.
Our day ends looking up recipes and cooking dinner together, snuggling on couch and watching our favorite Netflix shows.
A. Very. Good. Life.
Hiking and skipping stones ...
... with a ruggedly handsome man.
Our day ends looking up recipes and cooking dinner together, snuggling on couch and watching our favorite Netflix shows.
A. Very. Good. Life.
Friday, November 6, 2015
Fireball Shots
A week night date night ...
our most favorite band ever ...
... and Fireball shots.
Some nights are off the charts FUN!
Our favorite band Eskimo Brothers from Nashville made it to northeast Ohio for the first time ever and we had a week night, date night.
Honky tonk music filled the air and I had the best looking guy right next to me. Those lips. I look at them, I kiss them and after all this time I still cannot get enough of them. What a set of lips!
We are not drinkers, but some nights call for Fireball shots with my guy.
*To fun date nights with My Perfect ... cheers!*
our most favorite band ever ...
... and Fireball shots.
Some nights are off the charts FUN!
Our favorite band Eskimo Brothers from Nashville made it to northeast Ohio for the first time ever and we had a week night, date night.
We are not drinkers, but some nights call for Fireball shots with my guy.
*To fun date nights with My Perfect ... cheers!*
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
Autumnesque
Just when you believe summer is as good as it gets ...
Autumn comes along in breathtaking, vibrant color and reminds us that God shows us beauty in all seasons.
What fun He must have had giving us countless details in splashes of wild colors in leaves, flowers, animals and in us.
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